H.E.R.B.I.E. in…

H.E.R.B.I.E. RIDES AGAIN!

By D. Golightly

Editor’s Note: The events of this issue take place prior to the Thing leaving the Fantastic Four.

>…
>Audio receptors online.
>Power level .5%
>Initiate boot-up sequence.
>Scanning…
>…
>…
>Scan complete.
>Location: Baxter Building: Sublevel 12.
>Convert audio feed to power supply.
>Power level 3.2%
>Initiate Final Run Protocols
>…

In the lowest sublevel of the Baxter Building, several tinks! and bleeps! quietly reverberated off of the stainless steel walls. This was where the heroic genius, Reed Richards, kept his failed and untried experiments. As the world’s foremost forward thinker on subjects ranging from extradimensional invasion to macroverse physics, Richards was often forced to abandon his projects when a greater need arose.

Sometimes he would come back to reclaim the forgotten items, whether it be a subatomic transponder capable of counteracting the Psycho-Man’s plans, or a cosmic divining rod to locate rare astral gems. More often than not, however, Richards left the half-finished projects to collect dust.

In the farthest corner from the bulk elevator door, a pile of broken machinery shifted and moved as something stirred beneath it. A dented and partially rusted metal casing could be seen sifting through the heap, until it finally burst free in a triumphant explosion of shredded nuts and bolts.

The hovering robot was in bad need of polishing. The casing that was once reflective was now tarnished with age. His power levels were dangerously low, but thanks to the audio converter that Richards had installed the robot was able to recharge from any ambient noise its microphone picked up.

It wobbled unsteadily in the air, unsure of where to turn to next. The ancient cathode-ray tube monitor that displayed its face was cracked, and its dimly lit features appeared confused. Even though its artificial intelligence chip was state-of-the-art fifteen years ago, and it was capable of computing equations that today’s computers would stutter at, the robot still seemed somewhat apprehensive.

Why had it come back online now? What had happened to initiate this unknown subsequence of commands? The protocols themselves weren’t exactly forthcoming; the robot only knew that it was supposed to awaken and seek out the nearest member of its family.

It drifted aimlessly over the other tossed aside machinations of the famous hero scientist. It glanced left and right, its servos grinding against the rust that attempted to halt any progress it made. Its facial recognition program desperately tried to latch onto any semblance of its family, but all it saw was more and more junk.

BANG!

The robot stopped in midair, slowly turned to face the direction of the noise, and listened. Whatever was causing the noise must have been what generated the audio power necessary for the robot to awaken.

The robot bobbed in the air as it began to pursue the noise. The smashing sound of metal on metal continued as it neared, moving past the half-finished white and blue stylized Hulkbuster armor, and beyond the Pym Particle accelerator.

As the robot rounded the corner its facial recognition program finally acknowledged a familiar presence. Two entities, one on the floor, one standing over the other with fists raised. If the robot’s emotion circuits were functioning it might verbalize a cry of astonishment.

The ever-lovin’, blue-eyed Thing, Ben Grimm, lay prone on the floor. His orange, rocky chest moved up and down slowly to indicate that he was still breathing, but he was undoubtedly unconscious. One of the chips of rock that covered his face was loose, indicating that he had been recently punched and knocked out.

The second entity was only recognizable from the neck up. Below the creature’s head was a monstrosity of wires, uncovered metal limbs, gears, and circuit boards. The macabre figure was barely a robotic skeleton, and its movements were choppy and segmented. Both of its massive fists were intact, however, and it must have somehow surprised the Thing and knocked him out.

Above the head, where the hovering robot’s facial software made a positive identification, was covered in a purple artificial skin. Its snout protruded awkwardly from the center of its head, with horns and wide eyes to go along with it. The robot recognized it instantly as an old version of Diablo’s insipid creation, the Dragon Man.

The Dragon Man lifted its arms again and pounded down with two tons of the slagged framework that comprised its skeleton, slamming into a sealed chamber just behind the unconscious Ben Grimm. A sign above the chamber read, “Negative Zone Energy Spill Container.”

The robot accessed its worn memory, recalling that the chamber had been designed to catch and conceal the rampant energy that would sometimes spill out of the Negative Zone gateway. The gateway, just a few floors above them, was now perfected, but upon its original design Richards had problems with excess energy spikes ripping through his lab. Thus, he had designed this chamber to capture and contain the spikes.

The Dragon Man was trying to gain entry into the chamber, and if successful, would undoubtedly release the destructive power and level the Baxter Building. Was it operating on old protocols of its own? The robot couldn’t say, but it made no difference. It stood to reason that the old enemy creation, like the revived hovering robot, had been awaken somehow and gotten the drop on the Thing.

This must have been why during its initial scan of the area the Final Run Protocols had been set into motion. The robot knew what it had to do now.

The Dragon Man paid it no attention as it drifted closer, approaching from behind. A small slot opened near the base of the flying robot, and out extended a small rod with a sphere on the end of it. When it had been functional, it had never been allowed to access this part of its hardware before. Richards had programed it to use this only as a last resort, as part of the Final Run Protocols.

The next sound of metal bashing against metal boosted the robot’s power cells enough that it could access the rest of its dormant memory. It now knew that its name was H.E.R.B.I.E. and that it had been the first generation in its line of development. It had been loved and appreciated by its family, the Fantastic Four.

And now it would make the ultimate sacrifice to save them once again.

The bulbous rod extended nearly three feet out from the base of its casing, pointed directly at the Dragon Man. Black bubbles of energy began to form near its tip, quickly condensing into a powerful offensive energy. Cosmic in nature, it would take everything the robot had left in its systems to create and disrupt the energy. It only had one shot, and after that, it would fall to the floor and become a useless piece of junk once more.

The dim blue light on its monitor curved upward into a smile. It was pleased with itself, knowing that its final act would be to save one of its family. Even if they had forgotten the robot, H.E.R.B.I.E. had never forgotten them.

The black bubbles spun together to form a pinpoint of dark light. The robot hovered close enough that the Dragon Man finally noticed it. The hodgepodge villain let loose a vicious roar of defiance, raised its arms to smash the hovering robot, and—

—then the robot released its pent up energy, and everything went black.