You know what I need? A secretary. It’s the only possible way I’d be able to keep up with the stuff I’m supposed to do on a nightly basis.

Take tonight for instance. So far I’ve had to secure a job for one of my students; have a lecture with said student about not putting his life in danger; now I’m investigating the hotel where the Vulture’s been spotted hanging out; I still have to visit with one of my students who is in the hospital thanks to me; and then track down a rogue symbiote before it attaches itself to some poor soul.

This hotel business shouldn’t have taken long, but now I’ve stumbled into a larger mystery since I’ve discovered one of my students is being held prisoner and there are more girls hidden away somewhere in the building.

I wonder if Tony Stark or Reed Richards can recommend someone to organize my schedule…

HOW SWEET, FRESH MEAT!

By Tobias Christopher

Spider-Man was sitting next to the girl he’d just rescued, trying to convince her to tell him what was happening. He was starting to piece together what he was dealing with but he needed the girl to confirm his suspicions.

“It just happened so fast,” the girl told him with tears in her eyes. “I just wanted an internship with the modeling agency, so they took me into the back room to interview me. They gave me a glass of water while I waited, but there must have been something in it because I passed out. When I woke up, I was in a cage with other girls around me.”

“Where are the other girls?” asked Spider-Man calmly as he looked at her. “Can you lead me to them? I promise I’ll get you out of here, but first I need to know where the other hostages are.”

The girl nodded her head as Spider-Man tried to help her stand up. She led him to a bookcase along the wall. “It’s behind there,” the girl told him, then watched as he used his strength to pull the bookcase away from the wall, revealing a secret passage. He went to the window and shot a line of webbing down to the street.

“Come on, I’ll lower you down,” said the hero. “Then I want you to go to the nearest phone and tell the police everything that’s going on. It’s going to be all right, I promise.”

The girl nodded as Spider-Man lowered her to the ground outside. Once he saw she was safe, he headed back to the opening in the wall and rushed inside. Outside, the girl was running when she was caught by the security guards.

“Let me go!” the girl shouted as she was dragged back inside.

Drew Michaels was lying on the ground, having been knocked unconscious by the Vulture. The villain had been sent by his lover, Madame Borstein, to kill the young man since killing Drew would ensure that Borstein’s newest model, Maggie, would have nothing holding her back. Pulling out a knife, the Vulture stood over the young man, ready to plunge it into his heart.

Drew opened his eyes and saw the Vulture standing over him with the knife. Quickly, Drew panicked and grabbed his camera, setting the flash off in the villain’s eyes. Momentarily fazing the Vulture, Drew backed away as he lay on the ground before picking himself up and running.

“Now I’m going to really make you suffer,” said the Vulture as he readjusted to the darkness.

Flash sat up, realizing he was no longer in the alley. He was now laying on a couch in a hotel room, shirtless with the wounds on his chest and forehead patched up. He moaned as he stretched his sore body while he sat up. Those guys really gave him a good beating, then he realized—

“The girl! I have to go back and –”

“She’s fine,” Felicia said as she appeared in the doorway in her civilian identity. “You were pretty messed up, though, but I couldn’t leave you to die.”

“You!” said Flash as he backed up on the couch. “Why the hell am I here? Where’s my shirt? You didn’t…do anything to me, did you?”

“The only thing I did was save your life,” replied Felicia with a sigh. “And you’re welcome, by the way.”

Flash uneasily stood up, still in pain from his beating. “Why did you save me? Last I checked we didn’t exactly end things on friendly terms.”

“Why? Because you dumped me in the coldest way possible?” asked Felicia.

“Because you’re a thief and a con artist,” replied Flash as he finally found his shirt and pulled it on. “You steal from people for a living.”

“I’ve actually been trying to stay on the straight path as of late,” replied Felicia as she came towards him. “I’m not that person anymore.”

“You’re still wearing that costume,” said Flash as he backed up. “You’re not just wearing it for fetish purposes.”

“There’s the door,” replied Felicia as she walked by him. “Sorry I cared.”

Flash walked toward the door and put his hand on the knob. He stopped without turning around.

“Thank you.”

As he walked out, Felicia poured herself a drink. She couldn’t believe she brought that jerk back to her place when she knew how it would end. But she had other things to do before she left the city again and, luckily, Flash Thompson wasn’t one of them.

Spider-Man was making his way through the hidden tunnel in the hotel when his spider-sense alerted him to the other captives. He finally found them, all locked in cages.

“What is this, Hostel 3?” asked Spider-Man as he put hands on the bars of the first cage and started bending them. “Where’s the woman whose been holding you here?”

Before Spider-Man could pull the girl out, Spider-Man’s senses went off. He pushed the girl back into the cage and ducked just in time to avoid an electric prod that was about to strike him. He saw the same security guards that he’d fought with alongside Flash days earlier.

“A couple of lame security guards? Why not just send a squad of meter maids to take me on?” asked Spider-Man as he shot his webbing at the guard with the prod. He pulled it away and tossed it to the side as the hero jumped into the middle of the group before landing his first punch.

As Spider-Man fought them, Madame Borstein watched. She was intrigued by his strength and wondered how much power he really had…

“No whelp is going to show up the Vulture!” the villain shouted as he flew into the air to chase after his prey. He spotted Drew running down the street and prepared to dive bomb him, when he saw the young man run into alley. “You can’t escape from me that easily.”

As the Vulture got close enough to the alley to fly into it he was met by Flash Thompson’s fist, which sent the villain spiraling to the ground. Luckily Flash was on his way home and had cut through the alley where he’d bumped into Drew.

“Care to tell me why you’re after my student?” asked Flash as he pounded his fist into his palm. He felt like he’d cracked his knuckle on the Vulture’s face, but he wasn’t about to let the man on the ground know that. Luckily for Flash, this was giving him a major adrenaline rush; otherwise he would be in severe pain from that punch, coupled with the injuries he’d received earlier.

As the Vulture stood up, Flash looked at Drew. “Take notes, kid. I’m about to show you what a real brawl looks like.”

Before the villain could say anything, Flash grabbed the Vulture from behind and slammed him into a wall. When he saw that wasn’t enough to faze him, Flash did it again. By the time the police showed up, minutes after Drew called them, the Vulture was stuffed upside down inside of a garbage can, waiting to be taken away.

“You…you took on a supervillain for me?” asked Drew, still reeling from the shock. “He could have killed you.”

“I know,” said Flash as he stumbled forward a bit. “I think I need to go the hospital. The adrenaline rush is wearing off and I think I might have broken a few things.”

Spider-Man had finished webbing the guards to the floor and took a moment to refill his webshooters in case anything else showed up before he freed the captives. “Alright, now to save the damsels in distress,” said Spidey as he made his way to the cages. “Let’s make a quick exit before anything else happens.”

“Get away from my girls,” said Madame Borstein as she stood at the doorway. “They are my property, and you will not take them anywhere.”

“You’re nuts, lady,” said Spider-Man as he looked at her. “If you think that –”

A backhand from the woman quickly sent Spider-Man flying across the room and through the first wall he hit.

“As I said before, you will not be taking my girls anywhere,” repeated Madame Borstein.

“Who are you?” asked Spider-Man as he picked himself up from the rubble of the wall that had collapsed on him.

“Who I am is not your concern,” said Madame Borstein as she walked toward him, picking Spider-Man up by the throat. “You have interfered in things for the last time, Spider-Man.”

The woman tossed Spider-Man across the room again, crashing through another wall. She then grabbed Spider-Man by the leg and slammed him onto the ground behind her. As Spider-Man tried to stand up, Madame Borstein started laughing as she kicked the hero in the stomach, sending him flying once again.

“What’s the matter, arachnid? Can’t you fight a woman?” asked Madame Borstein.

“You’re not a woman, you’re a tank,” said Spider-Man as he picked himself up. He shot two strands of webbing at her, but the villainess grabbed them and pulled Spider-Man forward, punching him in the stomach, before sending him to the ground. He reached over and blindly felt around until he found a metal pipe, grasping it tightly in his hand.

“I think I’ve gone easy enough on you,” said Madame Borstein as she held him up by his neck. “It’s time to finish this.”

“You call that easy?” asked Spider-Man. “I’ve seen episodes of Jerry Springer that are less brutal.”

Madame Borstein brought Spidey closer and put her mouth to his masked lips.

At the hospital, Drew was sitting at A.J.’s bedside as his brother slept, and Flash was downstairs getting his hand bandaged after his fight with the Vulture. “The doctors say that you’re going to fully recover,” said Drew softly as he talked to his little brother. He didn’t know whether or not A.J. could hear him, but he continued to talk to him anyway. “You’ll be in the hospital for a while, but they’ll let you go home soon if you start to improve.”

Drew took his brother’s hand and tried not to cry over seeing A.J. like this. “You stupid bastard…why’d you have to go to that construction site? Why did you have to nearly get yourself killed? You’re the only family I have left. Dad…he’s not coming back. Hell, I can’t even find him. Packed his shit and left in the middle of the night before I could even tell him you were in here.”

Flash walked up to the room, standing outside as he listened to Drew talking.

“It’s just you and me, now, A.J.,” said Drew as he sat there. “But I’ve got a good job now and I’ll be able to actually take better care of you now. We don’t need our deadbeat dad; I don’t care if he ever comes back. We’re all we need.”

Flash stood there for a minute, taking in the fact that Drew and his brother were abandoned. What kind of a father does that to his children? Then Flash remembered that he had a father like that. He knocked on the door and looked inside.

“I’m all bandaged up, mind if I sit with you two for a while?” asked Flash as Drew motioned for him to take the other chair in the room. As Flash sat down, he realized that he would have to get involved with Drew and his brother, not because he was their teacher, but because he genuinely cared about them.

As Madame Borstein’s snake like tongue broke through Spider-Man’s mask and into his mouth, he knew instantly what he was dealing with. He’d never dealt with something like this, although he’d heard the tales from the likes of Dr. Strange and others who dealt in the occult.

Using the metal pipe he’d picked up, he pushed it through Borstein’s body. He hoped this would work, as he could feel his life force slipping away. Madame Borstein screamed in pain as she dropped Spider-Man and backed away, as the girls in the cages watched in horror.

“I knew it, you’re a succubus,” said Spider-Man as he stood up. “A creature who drains the life out of humans.”

Borstein pulled the pipe out of her body, her eyes starting to glow red. She looked at her hands, which were starting to wrinkle. She’d expended too much energy on the hero and needed to feed.

“Very good, Spider-Man,” said Borstein as she bent the pipe in half. “But I’m still strong enough to –”

Spider-Man broke off more bars off the cages and tossed them at her, hitting more spots on her body. One after the other, he continued to toss them into the creature, watching her weaken even more.

“Sucscubus to be you,” said Spider-Man as the girls around him groaned at his one liner. “Hey, they can’t all be winners.”

Borstein moaned and she started turning to dust even as she tried to claw and crawl her way toward Spider-Man.

“This isn’t the end,” she promised as she turned completely to dust. “I’ll claw my way back out of hell and have my –”

One of the girls stomped on her head, sending ash flying all around.

Flash and Drew arrived at the hotel after hearing on the news about what had happened. The captive girls, including the first one Spider-Man had rescued, were all being examined by the paramedics before being taken to the hospital.

“Maggie!” shouted Drew as he hugged his girlfriend. “What the hell’s going on?”

“It’s horrible,” said Maggie. “My career’s over. Madame Borstein was…well, you’ll never believe it.”

“Come on, I’ll take you for a bite to eat to calm your nerves,” said Drew as he took her hand. “You can tell me all about it.”

Up on the top of the building across the street, Spider-Man watched as the police and paramedics took care of the rest.

“Your handiwork, I presume?” asked Black Cat as she watched commotion alongside him.

“I just dealt with a soulsucking demon from Hell,” said Spider-Man without looking over at her. “This is the second time this month I’ve dealt with creatures from hell*.”

(*See Defenders #8-#9 – TC)

Black Cat looked down at the street and saw Flash observing things before heading home for the night. “I’m going to be leaving town again soon, hopefully for the last time. Maybe we can…have some fun, for old times’ sake?”

“Beating up bad guys fun or…the other kind of fun?” asked Spider-Man curiously.

“Stop thinking with that thing below your waist,” said Black Cat as she punched him in the arm. “Let’s go find some evil ass to kick.”

Adrian Toomes was sitting in jail cell, looking out at the other villains that Spider-Man had sent to the facility recently. Among them was Daniel Berkhart, also known as Mysterio. “Spider-Man nab you again?” asked Berkhart.

“No, some civilian clown got the best of me,” replied Toomes, embarrassed that someone other than his adversary had beaten him.

“Don’t worry, we won’t be in here long,” replied Berkhart as he played with a deck of cards. “You up for a little job when we get out?”

“What did you have in mind?” asked Toomes.

“Something…Sinister,” smiled Berkhart.

Norman Osborn sat in his chair sipping his drink as he read the latest stock reports. A knock came at the door as the butler led Rhett in. “You wanted to see me?” asked Rhett as Norman motioned for him to sit down.

“I’m pleased with your progress with May Parker,” said Norman as he stood up. “I take it everything’s going well with our plans?”

“Yeah…except…,” said Rhett as he took a deep breath. “This Peter Parker’s a total dick. I haven’t seen him visit her once. He never even calls or checks up on her. I’d like to have the Hobgoblin show this guy a thing or two…”

Norman smiled as he put his hands on Rhett’s shoulders.

“Great minds think alike…”