The rescue workers were called to the hotel when they got the 911 alert that a woman had started to give birth in an elevator. The woman had no choice but to begin delivery right there, with only one other person there to assist.

As the rescue workers opened the elevator, with the stretcher ready for the new mother, they found a sight they weren’t expecting. Peter Parker was standing over the exhausted mother, with three newborn babies in his arms, which wouldn’t be odd in itself except for the fact that he was in the elevator wearing nothing but a pair of boxers.

Hey, Spider-fans, I’ll bet you have a lot of questions. Have we reached L.A. yet? What are Flash and Felicia up to? Why am I naked in an elevator holding newborn triplets? Well, let’s start at the beginning…

VEGAS HUSTLE

Part I

By Tobias Christopher

Reno, Nevada
This Morning

Antoine Desloin stepped off the tour bus and looked up the city surrounding him. The man was dressed in 70’s era clothing, complete with five inch platform shoes and a large afro on his head. “Sin City, baby!” shouted the man known as the Hypno Hustler. “There’s gonna be a hot time in the old time tonight! Yeah! We’re gonna take Vegas by storm! The Hypno Hustler and the Mercy Killers are back, baby!”

The Hypno Hustler started laughing as his backup band joined in. They were soon joined by a small group of Elvis impersonators, who ended up laughing with them.

“What the–?!” Hypno Hustler said as he looked around. “Ain’t no fried peanut butter banana sandwiches in my pockets? Get out of here!”

“HOLY CRAP!” shouted Peter as he read the paper as he sat in the lobby of the hotel that the trio were currently staying at. He was eating breakfast with Felicia while Flash was upstairs showering. The paper was detailing the fact that a good chunk of Kansas had recently been nuked*. “Did you see what happened in Kansas? If we’d stayed any longer–”

[*Avengers #32]

“Well, I guess you can chalk that up to good luck,” Felicia told him with a smirk. “See? It’s good to have me by your side.”

“Yeah, especially so I can keep an eye on you,” retorted Peter.

“You still don’t trust me, do you?” asked Felicia with a sympathetic look.

“You were casing the place when we checked in,” replied Peter.

“Just wanted to be sure their security system was in good shape,” said Felicia as she looked at the man. “It never hurts to be on the lookout for new clients.”

“Uh huh,” said Peter as he stood up. “Well, do you want to go see what Sin City has to offer while we’re here? Flash should be down here any minute now.”

“Are you sure you want to wait for him?” asked Felicia. “I know we’re trying to get along, but–”

“I’d rather have Flash where I can keep an eye on him, especially in a place with top of the line porn being offered,” replied Peter. “And, speaking of which, I’d better go up and get him before he runs up the hotel bill…”

New York

“What do you mean you fired the private nurse I hired?” asked Drew as he talked to his brother through the bathroom door.

“I’m better now, Drew, I don’t need someone watching after me,” replied A.J. as he stood in front of the bathroom mirror, looking at the bandages on his side. They were covering the stitches he had gotten after getting impaled on a water pipe, only he wasn’t going to tell his brother that he’d popped two of them inadvertently. He was trying to get more bandages to cover the wound in the hopes that Drew wouldn’t notice.

“You’ve been out of the hospital for barely a week. I’m just… worried,” replied Drew.

A.J. pulled on a red t-shirt and opened the door. “Cut the bullshit, Drew. I know why you hired Hello Nurse.”

“I hired her to help you get better,” said Drew as A.J. stared him down.

“You hired her because she had the hots for me,” A.J. told him as he towered a full foot over his big brother. “Yeah, Drew, we talked. We had a whole conversation and she even understood when I told her that I wasn’t interested and that I already had someone. She got it. Mr. Thompson gets it. Mr. Parker gets it… hell, Billy’s dad got it, and he tried to kill us! The only person who doesn’t get it is you.”

“A.J., Billy’s not waking up,” Drew reminded him. “His brain got fried—”

“SHUT UP!” shouted A.J., cutting his brother off. Just hearing someone talk about Billy that way was more than enough to get him angered. “Billy’s going to wake up and, when he does, I’m going to be able to say that I stayed faithful to him. So just do me a favor and butt out of stuff that’s not your business!”

A.J. stormed into Flash’s room and slammed the door, unaware that this would possibly be the last time he would ever see his brother alive. Drew just stood there for a moment before he grabbed his camera and headed out the door.

Las Vegas

“So, which casino should we hit up first?” asked Flash as the three sort-of friends walked down the street, looking at the colorful buildings.

“Hey, check it out, a superhero themed casino,” said Felicia as the trio looked over at the Casino Marvel. “Let’s go there.”

As the trio walked in they didn’t notice the marquee that was publicizing the Mercy Killers concert that night. Earlier in the day, upon arriving, it didn’t take long for the Hypno Hustler to ‘convince’ the manager of the casino to make the band the head act.

Looking around, the trio saw cocktail waitresses dressed as Ms. Marvel. Rogue, Scarlett Witch and others; as a waitress dressed as Black Cat walked past, Felicia just rolled her eyes. “That looks nothing like me,” she said.

“She definitely looks like you from the back,” Flash said as he was eyeing the waitress as she walked away. Felicia and Peter smacked both him on the back of the head.”What?”

“Let’s just spend a few bucks gambling and go see the rest of the town,” Peter told him as he reached into his wallet. “I have a whole two bucks to waste.”

“I’ll see your two bucks and raise you a five spot, the change in my pocket and the unused condom in my wallet,” replied Flash as he looked into his own wallet as Felicia looked at him. “What? You’re going to get on my case now because I’m responsible?”

Peter looked in Flash’s wallet. “Hey, isn’t that the one they handed out to us when we were going to high school?”

“Responsible and thrifty, what a catch,” Felicia sarcastically said as she headed to the roulette table, where the dealer was dressed in a plastic Iron Man costume.

“Come on, Pete, we’re in Vegas! We need to be able to brag that we lost at least a hundred bucks or more while we were here,” Flash said as he nudged Peter. “I have my ATM card, so I’m going to draw out a few bucks.”

“Yeah, well, I left my ATM card in my suitcase back at the hotel,” replied Peter as he sighed. “But I guess I could run and go get it. Hey, who knows? I might hit the jackpot and walk away a millionaire.”

“Puny Peter Parker the Playboy?” laughed Flash.

“Well, it’s nice to dream at least,” replied Peter. “Just imagine the good I can do with that kind of money, though. I can repay Aunt May for all of the things she sacrificed for me over the years. Hell, I could probably even buy her a golden toilet and bathtub–”

“Yeah, yeah, we all want to give Aunt May a golden shower,” said Flash, not even paying attention to Peter anymore as he was already drawing money out to gamble away at the nearest ATM.

“… just tell Felicia I’ll be back soon,” replied Peter as he headed for the door. As he was about to exit, he saw the poster advertising the Mercy Killers. The Mercy Killers? Why does that name sound so familiar?

Walking out the door, Peter headed back to the hotel, the band’s name eating away at him. It was only when he was halfway up the street, he realized where he knew that name from.

The Hypno Hustler! I tangled with him some time ago. He was using hypnotic music to rob nightclubs. I was hoping that would be the last time I’d have to deal with him. Now he’s probably planning to do the same thing here in Vegas. Great, and my Spider-Man suit and web shooters are back at the hotel. I thought Vegas would be the one place where Peter Parker could cut loose without having to deal with the drama of being Spider-Man. There’s no way I’ll get to the hotel and back within the hour, so it looks like I’m going to have to take a shortcut.

Ducking into an alley, Peter kicked off his shoes, hiding them behind a dumpster as he attached himself to a wall and started climbing the side of the casino. Once he arrived on the roof, he got a running start and leaped over the rooftops of the casinos to get back to the hotel quicker than he would by walking.

New York

“Are you sure you’re up for band practice?” asked A.J.’s bandmate Chad as the group sat in the living room of Flash’s apartment, where the Michael’s brothers had been staying.

“It’s not really practice since we don’t have all of our instruments,” replied Chad’s brother Darren.

“We can still go over some new songs,” A.J. told them, “and I’ll be fine as long as I don’t overdo it. In about a week or two I’ll be as good as new and we can start practicing in the usual spot.”

“Provided the usual spot doesn’t collapse before then,” said Chad as he read over A.J.’s song book, “we really need to find a place to practice where the word ‘condemned’ isn’t one of the finer aspects.”

“All right, what do you guys think of the new song?” asked A.J. as he held his guitar in his hands.

“I don’t know, is ‘Daytime PETAS and Night Time Hunters’ really a song that’ll catch on?” asked Darren as he grabbed the book from Chad.

“I kind of like ‘Potholes in the Street’,” replied Chad as he got into a tug of war with Darren over the book.

“I guess it doesn’t really matter, it’s not like anyone’s ever going to listen to our band, anyway,” said A.J. with a sigh as he leaned back against the couch.

“You know, there is that big end of school thing next month, you should be healed in plenty of time for us to book that gig,” Chad told him. “What if me and the guys convince the school to let us perform while you heal? You should be fine by the end of May, right?”

“I’ll be better than fine,” A.J. told him excitedly. “Go for it! Guys, if we can pull this off it’ll just be the start of our band making it big. Pretty soon, everyone’s going to have our band’s name on their lips. No one’s ever going to forget the name ‘Infinity Gauntlet’ after this!”

Los Angeles

Mary Jane was sword fighting with her co-star, Nick Hammond, on the set of The Family Circus feature film that they were nearly finished filming. The cast had really bonded in between Bay blowing up each and every set, whether the film needed the scene or not.

“And cut!” the director shouted as the two actors stopped what they were doing. “Great work, you two! Someone call Riley and the other kids to the set so we can shoot their next scene.”

As Mary Jane and Nick walked toward the catering table, Nick looked over at her. “So, have you thought about what I asked?”

“Nick, you’re sweet and I enjoyed spending time with you off the set, it’s just… I’m not ready to start dating. I’m still not even sure where my marriage stands yet,” MJ told him. “Besides, I think we’re better off as friends. You and the kids are starting to feel like family.”

Nick just sighed as he started filling his plate. Mary Jane decided to check up on Riley before he started filming his scenes and headed to his dressing room.

Las Vegas

Peter arrived back at the hotel shortly, stripping off his clothes as soon as he got through the door of the room he was staying in. He headed to the bed to find his suitcase with his costume but saw nothing there.

“What the hell? Where’s my stuff?” asked Peter frantically as he looked under the bed. It was then that he heard his cell phone ringing in his pants pocket. Grabbing it from his pants, he picked up. “Hello?”

“Hey, Pete, it’s Flash. Felicia just told me to tell you that they upgraded our suites because of some business deal she struck with them. We’re staying two floors up in room 612B. They moved our stuff up there about an hour ago.”

“Terrific. Thanks. I’ll see you soon,” said Pete as he hung up. “Well, it’s good to know that the old Parker luck is still in full effect. Maybe it’s best that I don’t gamble away any money. Oh, well, at least things can’t get much worse.”

And just as Peter said that, the door started to open as a couple was led into the room by the bellboy. By the time they got through the door, Peter had attached himself to the ceiling.

“And this is your suite,” the manager told them. “We hope you enjoy your stay.”

Don’t look at the clothes on the floor, don’t look at the clothes on the floor…

“The people who upgraded must have left these here,” said the bellboy as he picked up the pile of Peter’s shed clothes. “I’ll just take these up to their room.”

I hate my life.

As soon as the bellboy walked away, the couple giggled and threw themselves down onto one of the beds. Peter figured they were on their honeymoon and wouldn’t notice him crawling out the window. Hopefully he wouldn’t be spotted scaling the building this far up.

New York

Drew was walking home after taking some pictures for the Bugle when he saw his girlfriend, Maggie, walking down the street. Ordinarily he’d be glad to see her, but she was walking with… them. Behind Maggie was what Drew, and half the school, referred to as the ‘B-Squad’. Take a guess what the ‘B’ stands for. Before he could hide, he found that he’d been spotted.

“Hey, Maggie, isn’t that the guy you hang out with?” asked Melissa, the head bi- ‘B-Squad’ member. She was blonde, busty, and the head cheerleader.

“You mean my boyfriend?” asked Maggie.

“He looks dirty,” added Jessica, who was taller than the others. She spoke in a long, slow tone. The other three girls shuddered as Drew walked up to them, hoping beyond hope a bus would come by that he could toss himself in front of.

“Drew? What happened to you?” asked Maggie.

“Fire uptown, got a little to close and got covered in dust from falling debris,” Drew told her. “Got some great shots of the Scarlet Spider, though, so I’m heading to the Bugle now to turn in the pics. Want to get a bite to eat after?”

“Actually, we’re on our way to a modeling agency with our portfolios,” Maggie told him. “But why don’t you go home and clean up and maybe we can catch up later?”

“Sure,” Drew said as he went to kiss her cheek but she backed off. “Oh, right, the dirt. I guess I’ll see you later, then.”

As the girls walked away, only one of them turned their head to see how disappointed Drew was that he couldn’t get a kiss from his own girlfriend.

Las Vegas

Flash was playing the X-Men themed slots with a cup full of quarters. He was coming out ahead so far and was hoping to remain so. He pulled the lever and watched the three pictures of a smiling Wolverine line up.

“You win, Bub!”

The coins spilled out of the machine as Flash threw another quarter in. Elsewhere, Felicia was playing blackjack with the dealer dressed as Thor. The other players groaned as Felicia won again. It certainly didn’t help them that she was using her bad luck powers to jinx everyone around her.

“I wonder where Peter’s at,” said Felicia as she collected her winnings. “I hope he’s not just hanging out somewhere, waiting for something to happen.”

“I’m ahead five hundred bucks so far!” Flash shouted as he came up Felicia. “I love Las Vegas!”

“I hate Las Vegas,” said Peter as he tried to look the various windows on the sixth floor to find his suitcase. He was lucky so far and hadn’t seen anything that wouldn’t scar him mentally anymore than he was already was. Finally he found the room with his stuff. “Finally, some good luck!”

Peter tried to open the window, but found it was locked from the inside. “Damn. Luckily I still have my room key. I’ll just go in through the roof entrance and hopefully avoid being seen.”

Moments later, Peter was inside the hotel and headed for the nearest elevator. Getting in and pushing the button for the sixth floor, Peter found he was soon joined by a pregnant woman who looked like she was carrying triplets. As the door closed, Peter looked down at his watch.

Of course. Wait for it, Parker. Three… two….

The woman screamed in pain as she held her pregnant stomach. “I’m going into labor!”

Which brings us pretty much up to speed now. I just hope Felicia realizes what’s going on and can hold out against the Hypno Hustler’s music until I can get there…

“Peter said he’d be right back, I wonder what’s keeping him,” said Flash as he walked with Felicia to the showroom where the band was playing. “He’s going to miss the show.”

“He probably got caught up in something else,” Felicia told him as they took a seat at the table. “He’ll be back soon enough. Think we can be civil towards each other that long?”

“I guess so,” replied Flash. “Besides, I could do worse than having you for a dinner date.”

“Why, Flash Thompson, that’s the sweetest thing you’ve said to me this whole trip,” Felicia told him.

The lights started dimming as the curtain raised as the Hypno Hustler stepped onto the stage.

“Good evening, Las Vegas!” the Hypno Hustler said. “Get ready for a night you’re never going to forget!”

To be continued…