Peter Parker was sitting across from the man he hoped would be his new employer. Gale Wilson was an older man who’d been working at his job for Brony Pictures for the last thirty years, working his way up from a janitor to head the special effects wing of the studio. He had thinning black hair and a moustache, and looked very respectable for a man in his position.

The man was responsible for overseeing the effects for such pictures as ‘Lawnmower Man 3: There Was a Part 2?’, ‘Showgirls vs. Aliens’, the Joe Don Baker epic ‘Mitchell Unchained’ and the upcoming ‘The Family Circus’ starring Mary Jane Watson-Parker. They were also preparing to film the Spider-Man movie, starring a virtually unknown actor as the title character.

During his recent trip to Los Angeles, Peter had crossed paths with a special effects person on the set of the Family Circus movie, who had told Peter to call his New York contact should he ever want a career in the movie industry. With Midtown High closed for the time being, Peter needed a new source of income, which brings us to this moment.

“You have very good credentials, Mr. Parker,” Wilson said as he looked over the resume Peter had brought with him. “In fact, maybe a little too good. Why would someone with your potential want to work at a special effects studio?”

“Well, science has always been a passion of mine,” Peter replied as he sat there. “Whether it’s working in a lab, or teaching high school students, I believe there’s always room for it in the jobs I take. I believe I can bring a little of that to this field, too. Special effects are all about science, from smoke machines to animatronics.”

“I like you, kid,” Wilson smiled. Peter did seem to have the qualifications needed. “I’ll give you a try. You start first thing Monday morning, developing the effects for the Spider-Man movie.”

“Thank you, sir,” Peter said as he reached across the desk to shake the man’s hand. And to land the job on his own life story was another plus. “You won’t regret it.”

“I certainly hope not,” Wilson replied as he sniffed the air as Peter reached across the desk toward him. “Do you smell nacho cheese?”

NACHO ORDINARY ADVENTURE

By Tobias Christopher

One Hour Earlier

“Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever a spider can,” Spider-Man hummed to himself as he was web-slinging throughout the city of New York. It was one of those days where it felt great to be alive, and even better to be a superhero. Outside of the Midtown High incident the previous week, which resulted in the school being closed down for quarantine, Peter Parker’s life was going exceptionally well.

Peter was on speaking terms with his ex-girlfriend again, he was about to land a new job that he hoped would be more exciting than that of a high school science teacher; and all of his friends and family were safe and sound.

The only other thing that was really eating away at him was the fact that he now had a son. Drew Michaels had been revealed by the Jackal to be a cloned hybrid of Peter Parker and Gwen Stacy’s DNA. Drew, thanks to some rapid aging on the Jackal’s part, was now seventeen and had no idea who he really was. Peter was debating telling him, but wasn’t sure how he’d take it. Aunt May, on the other hand, was more than excited to learn that Peter had finally given her a grand-nephew to potentially spoil with gifts and cookies.

“Whoa, calm down, Aunt May,” Peter told her two days earlier after a dinner at Flash Thompson’s apartment. “Drew doesn’t know, and he can’t know. Not now.”

“Peter, he’s just a boy, he’ll understand. Besides, a boy needs his father,” May told him. “Just like you needed Uncle Ben when he was with us.”

“Drew has Flash watching him,” Peter told her. “Maybe it’s better if Drew never finds out. What if hates me? What if he blames me for the Jackal creating him? What if–?”

“What if Drew loves you like a son?” May asked him. “What Drew does or doesn’t do with the information is his decision. But he has a right to know who his father is, especially after all he’s gone through.”

“Aunt May is right, he has to know the truth,” Spider-Man told himself as his spider-sense started tingling, directing him toward a disturbance about a half a block away. “Right after I take care of this. It’s probably some big time supervillain like Doc Ock or the Rhino wanting to cause trouble. A good fight with a powerhouse like those two should get me in the right mood to–”

As Spidey let go of his web and landed feet first on the pavement, his thoughts were cut short as he laid eyes on the villain he was actually about to face. Instead of someone who could have put up a good fight like Electro or Dr. Octopus, it was an overweight woman in a large yellow leotard. She had blonde hair, and on her head was a sombrero that was made out of nachos, complete with a river of cheese flowing around the brim.

Spider-Man just rubbed the bridge of his masked nose with his gloved fingers as the villainess stomped towards him. “I’ll bet Squirrel Girl never has to deal with stuff like this.”

“So, the great Spider-Man has finally seen fit to match muscle with his greatest villain yet!” the woman shouted. “Prepare to face the might of–”

“Please don’t say your name,” Spider-Man begged.

“Nacho Mama!”

“Congratulations, kid, I heard about you getting a clean bill of health,” Ben Reilly said to his young friend, A.J. as they were working out.

“It’s all thanks to you, I think your exercise and diet program was what did it,” A.J. replied as he did some pull-ups while Ben spotted him. “It’s like ever since that night when all the students went insane, I’ve been feeling a million times better. I feel stronger and healthier than I ever have.”

“Well, you’ve been putting in a lot of work to get where you are,” Ben replied as A.J. came down from the bar. “I’m proud of you, kid.”

“Thanks,” A.J. told him as he got a sad look on his face.

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s Tommy,” A.J. said as he stared down at his sneakers. They were beat up and had a hole in the right shoe, but he still loved them. “We’re kind of . . . dating now. Only I feel like I’m cheating on Billy.”

Ben sighed as he an arm around A.J.’s shoulder. “Young love. I remember, well Peter remembers, what that was like. I’m sure Billy would want you to do what makes you happy. And when he wakes up, you two can talk about what’s going on and hopefully come to an understanding. You really like this kid, don’t you?”

“Yeah,” A.J. blushed as he tried not to laugh. “He’s just so . . . open and honest. He doesn’t take life’s bullshit lying down, you know? I mean, I’m not too keen on the smoking, but I really do like him.”

“Then go for it,” Ben told him as he mussed A.J.’s hair. “Sounds like you’ve really got your life together now. You’re going to go far, kid, I know it.”

Spider-Man hit the side of the brick wall, covered in a gooey layer of nacho cheese. He pulled himself free and stood up as Nacho Mama came running toward him, ready to plow right through the hero.

“Why do I always get stuck with the nut-jobs, or why can’t I at least get to fight someone made out of something more delicious, like Oreo cream filling?” Spider-Man asked himself as he jumped out of the way, just as Nacho Mama plowed right through the brick wall. Spider-Man landed on his feet and started shooting a layer of webbing at the villainess as she stood up. “Okay, Nacho Mama, time to get dipped!”

The villainess ripped the webbing off as she stomped toward Spider-Man, who flipped out of the way before she could grab him. Landing near a fire hydrant, Spidey twisted it open and let the spray of water hit Nacho Mama, sending her flying back.

“No! My nacho hat is getting soggy! The source of my powers is fading!” Nacho Mama cried out as the river of nacho cheese slid out of the hat and on to the street, where it ran into the sewers. With her powers gone, Nacho Mama started shrinking down into the form of a four-foot dwarfish woman as she ran up and kicked Spider-Man in the shin.

“Okay, now you’re being immature,” Spider-Man said as he heard the sound of police cars approaching. He shot a solid layer of webbing over the de-powered villain before swinging away to make his job interview.

“This is getting creepy,” Drew said to himself as he smiled at Aunt May. The two were working a shift at the F.E.A.S.T. Project, a place dedicated to helping the less fortunate. He’d caught May staring at him several times during the day already. While he liked the idea of a cougar hitting on him, he just wasn’t sure he wanted to go that old for his first one. “So, is everything okay, Ms. Parker?”

“You can call me Aunt May,” May told him as she put a hand on his shoulder. “I feel like we’re close enough for you to do that.”

“Uh, yeah,” Drew said with a nervous laugh as he picked up some blankets. “I’m just going to put these over on the counter and get some more boxes from the back.”

Drew nearly stumbled over himself as he made his way to the door leading to the supply room. He didn’t know what was going on lately, but it seemed like everyone in Peter Parker’s family was acting goofy as of late.

Flash was out looking for a job to make ends meet until the high school reopened. He just needed something to help pay the bills, not wanting to have to rely on Drew’s job at the Bugle. He was the man of the house and he needed to be the one bringing the biggest paycheck in.

As he walked down the street, he saw a sign on the bar that had a ‘Help Wanted’ sign in the window. Flash needed the money, true, but he was also a recovering alcoholic and wasn’t sure if being behind a bar was something that he needed. But he was also coming up empty in his quest to find a good paying job. He had to weigh his options carefully before going forward.

As he was about to at least see what the job entailed, his cell phone started ringing. “Hello?”

“Time to make that phone call,” a dark echoing voice said as it quickly hung up.

Flash looked down at his phone, seeing that he’d pulled out a red card along with his cellphone. The card that Mephisto had given him*, only now there was text on the card. A phone number and writing, telling him what to say.

*(ASM #24 – Your friendly neighborhood TC)

Flash was hesitant, but he’d made a deal with the devil to save Drew’s life. And all he had to do was make a phone call. It’s not like he had to kill a person or anything, so he dialed the number on the back of the card. The number he dialed got routed to another cell-phone half-way across the city, making Flash completely unaware of whose cell-phone he was actually dialing.

“Hello?” the voice asked, being distorted by a static-like connection. Flash couldn’t tell who he was talking to, nor could the person on the other end tell who the voice on Flash’s end belonged to.

“Yeah, I’m supposed to deliver a message,” Flash said, trying to get his message through the static.

“Darren, is that you?” the voice on the other end asked, trying to hear the caller. “I can barely hear you. Speak up, bro.”

“I have a message for you!” Flash shouted, barely able to make the other person out. He read off of the card in his hand word for word. “Practice has been moved to 887 North Main Street! In the auditorium, tonight at 6!”

“Seriously? That’s like so far away!” the voice on the other end shouted. “Okay, I’ll see you there!”

“What?”

“What?”

The connection was cut off on both ends at the same time as Flash stared down at his phone. “That wasn’t so bad. And no one got hurt.”

The card in Flash’s hand suddenly ignited and burnt up instantly as Flash shook his hand to shake off the slight burning on his fingertips.

“My friends must have found a new place for us to practice,” A.J. told Ben as he put his phone away. “We’ve been looking for a permanent place to rehearse since I had to leave the old house behind.”

“Are you guys any good?” Ben asked as he laced up his shoes.

“We’re pretty good,” A.J. told him with a smirk. “We’ve been together since before I came down with cancer. They had to replace me for a while, but once I went into remission they took me right back in. We’re going to make it big someday.”

“I’d love to hear you guys play sometime,” Ben told him as he stood up and looked up at his watch. “But right now I have an interview at the new company that’s opening. Malware International, the computer company, is merging with Chem-X and they’re hiring for people with science backgrounds. If this job goes right, I can be one of the first new hires at MalChem-X.”

“And I have to meet up with Tommy,” A.J. told him as he picked up his gym bag. “I’ll catch you later, Ben. And thanks for everything.”

“Don’t mention it, kid,” Ben told him as he started cleaning up the equipment.

“I got the job,” Peter said as he kissed his Aunt May’s cheek as he dropped by F.E.A.S.T. on his way home with some supplies he’d been asked to pick up. He also had a bag full of Oreos in his other arm. “I start Monday on the Spider-Man movie special F/X.”

“Spider-Man? Won’t that be a bit awkward?” May asked as she folded some blankets.

“It’s not like they’re using my name or life, just the basic concept,” Peter told her. “And this Riley kid is a nice up and coming young actor. I saw the early footage of the Family Circus movie. He’s going to knock it out of the park.”

Drew came out of the back with some more boxes to put the provisions in. “Hey, Mr. Parker.”

“Mr. Parker was my dad, you can call me da – Peter,” Peter stumbled, nearly letting the cat out of the bag. “We’re not in class anymore, Drew, don’t be so formal.”

“Okay,” Drew told him. “Peter. I was hoping you could take me out and show me how you got those incredible shots of Spider-Man you always got that no one else could. Jameson’s up my–” Drew looked at Aunt May, stopping himself before a curse word came up. “Spine about getting better pictures.”

“Sure thing, kid,” Peter told him. “Meet me at my apartment in an hour and we’ll go out and do that. In the meantime, I have to get home and get this cheese smell off of me. Long story, but I’ll see you two later.”

A.J. and Tommy were sitting on a bench in the park, having gotten some ice cream cones. Tommy slowly reached his hand over and put it over A.J.’s.

“You didn’t jerk your away hand that time,” Tommy told him as he licked his cone. “You’re getting better at this dating thing. Maybe in a couple of weeks we can work our way up to kissing in public.”

“I just – I’m still not sure about this whole thing,” A.J. told him as Tommy squeezed his hand. “I want to give this whole dating a shot, I just want to take it slow. I want to really get to know you before we . . . do anything we regret.”

Tommy smirked as he looked at A.J. “Jesus, A.J., you can say it. Sex. You’re talking about us having sex.”

“We just started dating,” A.J. told him as he looked over at Tommy. “And I never even got that far with Billy, and we’ve been together for a long time. I just don’t want to us to do something that we’ll regret later on if we don’t make it.”

“You’re still in love with Billy, I get that,” Tommy smiled as he reached over to A.J.’s face. “You have a little ice cream right there on your lip,” he wiped it off with his finger as A.J. smiled while blushing. “We’re not going to do anything you don’t feel like doing, okay? I’m a patient guy, we’ll take it as slow as you like. You’re worth waiting for.”

“Speaking of waiting, I have to get to band practice,” A.J. said as he kissed Tommy’s cheek. “I’ll call you later tonight, okay?”

“I’m holding you to that,” Tommy smiled as he watched A.J. rush off. He wished he had a cigarette right now, but he threw his last pack away when A.J. came to him and said he wanted to give them a shot. He was going to give up cigarettes just for a chance at love.

“We’ve been waiting weeks for the Lizard to come out of hiding,” Shocker said as he paced around the hideout he was sharing with the Rhino. “I’m tired of hanging out in the shadows, waiting for that freak to do something big. We need to get the Vulture and Mysterio out of prison now.”

“No, we wait,” Rhino told him as he read a tiny comic book in his huge hands. “You heard what Mysterio said. We need something big to go down so the Spider doesn’t go anywhere the prison while we’re doing our thing. We need something huge to keep him busy.”

“Then we give him something huge,” Shocker told him with a devious smirk as he pounded his fist into his palm. “No more waiting for the Lizard. We’re going to give Spidey a distraction he’ll never forget.”

“So, the job’s going well?” Peter asked as he walked toward the Daily Bugle building alongside Drew. “Jameson’s not getting to you, is he?”

“What? No, Jameson yells a lot, but I think he’s cool,” Drew told him as they got to the front doors. “He thinks I still need more practice getting pictures of Spider-Man, though. He still thinks no one’s as good as you.”

“Really? The old sourpuss said that?” Peter asked in amazement. “I’m shocked he has a kind word to say to anyone.”

“Well, he didn’t say it exactly that way,” Drew replied. “It was more like ‘Parker could get a better picture by taking a picture with a camera up his ass.’, but take that how you will.”

Flash walked into his apartment and saw the place was empty. The boys were still out and probably wouldn’t be out until later. As Flash sat down, he remembered Mephisto’s words to him the night he made the deal. He still had to tell Drew the exact details of what he’d done to save the boy’s life, he just hadn’t had the time lately to sit down with Drew to talk to him.

“Okay, I’ll tell him when he comes home tonight,” Flash said to himself. “Then this whole ordeal will be behind us.”

“Well, let’s see what news stories there are to cover tonight and we’ll hit the streets to get some pics,” Peter replied as they entered the building.

Flash had actually just missed A.J., who had swung by the apartment to pick up his guitar on the way to band practice. His group, Infinity Gauntlet, was going to be huge someday. They just needed their big break. As he walked into the auditorium, he was shocked to see that the place was already being used.

“Alright, class,” the elderly teacher said as she was instructing a class of first graders. “Tomorrow night’s the big show, so this is the final rehearsal. Let’s make it count.”

“What the hell is going on?” A.J. asked as the piano player started playing a song from ‘A Clockwork Orange: The Musical’. He put his guitar down and took a seat, waiting for his friends to arrive.

Meanwhile, the Lizard was in the sewers below the auditorium. He heard the piano playing and smelled the fresh meat of humans. It was dinner time, and he was going to eat well tonight.

To be continued…